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I'd suggest it would be best if someone's racial background wasn't made to be an important part of the conversation at all.
At least not unless it happens to have some relevance like in relation to places they have personally experienced or languages they speak or something like that.
Where a person's grandparents came from isn't (or shouldn't be) a big deal compared to most other things about that person.
It isn't a big deal, but family histories really interest me and I guess I'm trying to find a way to ask a multiracial person about their family history without trying to make it sound like it's about race.
Like I said to someone else, it's much more informative to know that Kamala Harris' father was not just black, but Jamaican. But if you do want to introduce race as well, it's also more informative to know that he was also multiracial, having a parent who had a European parent. I think that can show you where a person comes from in the sense of what they consider their heritage to be. Which is not so much about race as it is about where people's ancestors have lived in the past and what sort of cultures have been passed down through the generations.
Does that make sense?
The unfortunate problem is that it is such a big deal for far too many Americans. Makes the whole topic a much more complex minefield.
I disagree with this. A person's heritage can be important. Racists attitudes can grow out of not understand a person's culture. of course, a person's heritage can also NOT be important. People do lose connections to the homeland and this seems to be more common in America.
Heritage isn't necessarily the same as the colour of your skin, though.