me_irl

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me_irl (lemmy.world)

submitted 3 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 months ago (2 children)

There have been many times that I justified gaining weight via alcoholism because I thought maybe if I was disgusting no one would assault me again. Turns that that's not only not true, I've become disgusted with and hate my own body. So now I have a crippling alcohol addiction in addition to hating myself, and being afraid of interacting with certain people.

I've done a lot of therapy. And I will continue to do a lot of therapy. I almost graduated from therapy this spring, and had curbed my alcohol intake. But, then I had to get a restraining order and my brain fell right back into it's old habits. It shouldn't be this hard to feel safe as a middle aged adult lol

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Shit’s hard, it sounds like you have come a long way. I’m rooting for you ❤️

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago

Thank you 💜

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago

Hey friend. I'm on your team here. I can't help you but I'm rooting for you so hard.

It's hard. Fuckin hardest thing you'll ever do. You don't have to succeed in one try, or all at once. Every day is another chance to succeed just a little bit more, even if you stumbled yesterday.