Selfhosted
A place to share alternatives to popular online services that can be self-hosted without giving up privacy or locking you into a service you don't control.
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Two things, I think, that are making your view and mine different.
First, the value of time. I like self-hosting things, but it's not a 40 hour a week job. Docker lets me invest minimal time in maintenance and upkeep and restricts the blowback of a bad update to the stack it's in. Yes, I'm using a little bit more hardware to accomplish this, but hardware is vastly cheaper than my time.
Second, uh, this is a hobby yeah? I don't think anyone posting here needs to optimize their Nextcloud or whatever install to scale to 100,000 concurrent users that required 99.999999% uptime SLAs or anything. I mean yes, you'd certainly do things differently in those environments, but that's really not what this is.
Using containers simplifies maintaining and deploying, and a few percent of cpu usage or a little bit of ram is unlikely to matter, unless you're big into running everything on a Raspberry Pi Zero or something.
I don't think our views are so incompatible, I just think there are two conflictual paradigms supporting a false dichotomy: one that's prevalent in the business world where "cost of labour shrinks cost of hardware" and where it's acceptable to trade some (= a lot of) efficiency for convenience/saving manhours. But this is the "self-hosted" community, where people are running things on their own hardware, often in their own house, paying the high price of inefficiency very directly (electricity costs, less living space, more heat/noise, etc).
And docker is absolutely fine and relevant in this space, but only when "done right", i.e. when containers are not just spun up as isolated black boxes, but carefully organized as to avoid overlapping services and resources wastage, in which case managing containers ends-up requiring more effort, not less.
But this is absolutely not what you suggest. What you suggest would have a much greater wastage impact than "few percent of cpu usage or a little bit of ram", because essentially you propose for every container to ship its own web server, application server, database, etc… We are no longer talking "few percent" of overhead of the container stack, we are talking "whole new machines" software and compute requirements.
So, in short, I don't think there's a very large overlap between the business world throwing money at their problems and the self-hosting community, and so the behaviours are different (there's more than one way to use containers, and my observation is that it goes very differently in either). I'm also not hostile to containers in general, but they cannot be recommended in good faith to self-hosters as a solution that is both efficient and convenient (you must pick one).