this post was submitted on 16 Jul 2023
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ADHD

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@NomedaBarbarian on Twitter:

Thinking about how I've been lied to as an #ADHD person about what habits are.

That apparently is not what neurotypical folks get to experience.

Habits are things that they do without thinking.

They don't have to decide to do them. They don't have to remember to do them. Things just happen, automatically, because they've done them enough for that system to engage and make them automatic.

That system...which I lack.

Every single time I have brushed my teeth, it's been an active choice. I've had to devote thought and attention to it. It's not a routine, it's not a habit, it's something that I know is good to do, and hopefully I can remember to do it.

Every single time I exercise, or floss, or pay my rent, or drink water, or say "bless you" when someone sneezes,

It's because I've had to actively and consciously engage the protocol.

It never gets easier.

Just more familiar.

It's part of my struggle with my weight--exercise never becomes a habit, and every single time I do it, it is exactly as hard as the first time. It takes exactly as much willpower & thought.

I got lied to about how it would just "turn into a habit". And blamed, when it didn't.

Drinking water isn't a habit. Feeding myself isn't a habit. Bathing isn't a habit.

I spend so much more energy, so much more time, so much more labor on just managing to maintain my fucking meat suit.

And now you want me to ALSO do taxes?

ON TIME?

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[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Reading this post and the comments has made me question whether I am neurotypical or not. I was never diagnosed with any kind of neurodivergence, but autism is present in my family. Is it possible that I’ve picked up ways of thinking from them or is it likely that I have some of the same traits, if not enough to warrant a diagnosis?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

How 'bout this. Next time you are at the doctor's office for whatever reason, you bring it up. Don't stress it for now.

Many things that autistic or ADHD people do are relatable to most people. It's the old "frequency and duration of symptoms" that indicate neurodivergence.

Maybe favorite posts that seem very relatable to you and you can make a list of these things before going in. Seriously, MAKE A LIST or have the favorites on your phone or you'll forget. If you are having significant troubles (like hygeine maintenance), go in sooner.

I make this reply with the assumption that you see your doctor at least once a year.

Imposter syndrome is kind of an Autistic and ADHD thing. You can have a ton of symptoms and still convince yourself that you're just doing it to fit in with the cool kids, haha.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

I will have to do that. This post prompted me to read multiple articles on neurodivergence, ADHD, and autism, and the relatability of much of it is honestly quite shocking. So that’s one more thing to talk to my doctor about (I already have a list of things to bring up with my doctor, though most of them concern physical health).