this post was submitted on 22 Aug 2023
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Confidently Incorrect

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When people are way too smug about their wrong answer.

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[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago

At some point you stop bleeding Doogie Howser. If you're lucky that'll be before you run out of blood, in which case, according to your theory of medicine, you'll be infected anyway.

If it's after you run out of blood, well, infection wasn't your main problem.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago (4 children)

I recommend 1g of aspirin and a good bloodletting.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

That's for pansies.

You can buy warfarin off the shelf in the form out pest poison.

If you wanna set a world record for death by blood loss, that's the way to do it.

Remember kids:

All things are poison, and nothing is without poison; the dosage alone makes it so a thing is not a poison.

—Paracelsus, 1538

Often condensed to "The dose makes the poison."

Also, death by warfarin overdose is a slow, bloody, painful way to go. Don't self medicate with fucking rat poison or anything stupid.

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago

No child left behind was a travesty

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

morons are everywhere

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Nothing can enter your bloodstream if you just let it bleed.

Exactly. Just like how fish cannot swim upstream no matter how slow or fast the flow is.

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[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

You're all taking it out of context. They said "soap and water", meaning you're supposed to keep bleeding until you can wash it with soap and water.

DO NOT wash it with cow manure

See? It makes perfect sense...

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

He's got a point there actually. You definitely don't need poison in your body. By definition, that might kill you if there's enough of it.

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[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

Inside my shell I wait and bleed

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