ADHD memes

I think it's definitely had the positive effects that you mention. People are far less cruel, more understanding, and also WAY more willing to go seek help with these types of problems than they used to be.

The negative effect is that anytime something becomes romanticized, it's human nature for people to adopt it as an identity, which introduces a lot of noise to the conversation, and we lose some of our objectivity toward it, as now there's an emotional attachment to the label itself. For example:

• Back in the day (early 2010s?) of tumblr, when people first started collecting mental health labels like personal trading cards.
• Or now, with the plethora of pseudoscientific misinformation about mental health on tiktok: random people are just making up terms or symptoms and pitching them in a nearly universally relatable way like horoscopes.
• If you offer people a label that makes them feel part of a group, supported, and potentially explain why a bunch of things in their life are hard, it's in our nature to gravitate toward that.

All that being said, I still think it's a net-positive effect. This is just what happens anytime something clinical enters the mainstream conversation.

I hate it. Sure. Being called a retard isn't great, but having people claim ASDs are just a different way of thinking is downplaying problems. Oh how quirky we are!

If I wasn't retarded, I would have been able to study properly instead of relying on hyperfocus and high ascociative thinking. I would have graduated. If I wasn't retarded, I would have been able to do things consistently and perseveer. Instead, I lose and gain weight over and over. I'm going to develop diabetes at this rate. Going to a 24/7 open gym is the only chance I got at staving off the problems caused by depression and my dopamine hunger induced eating disorder. If I wasn't retarded, people would have appreciated me more. Instead, I am too much. Say too much. Exist too much. Even when I predict something, or suggest something that people think was good, they believe someone else in the group thought of it.

Furthermore, downplaying the issues could have people mistake just how capable people with autism/ADHD are. People shouldn't think that starting a family with someone autistic is just "going to be a little different." People seriously ought to reconsider marrying someone lacking theory of mind skills. And autists should seriously reconsider whether or not they are suitable parents. Baby cries? Can't have a meltdown. Baby needs consistent care? Better not have exec. dys. inhibiting your jobsecurity and energy management. Need to be able to get on the level of the child, make the child feel heard and understood? Sucks for the kid if the parent lacks that ability too. Both my parents are autistic/AD(H)D, and were downright neglectful and one abusive. They have no real friends. They struggle with emotional regulation and communication. I've been working my ass off to become better than them.

I don't care what people call having multiple mental disabilities. What's important is helping children on the spectrum. Early detection could have spared me further brain damage and subsequent stacking of developmental problems.

No, no, I know what hyperfocus is, it's the reason I no longer touch creative writing with a ten foot pole after getting bombarded with "but you wrote this one in an hour and it is awesome! just write another one!" :D

I meant that I am wondering if normal people just get the same productivity but without it being flipped on or off randomly, provided they don't get distracted by something. You know, kinda like learning that it's not just a tv thing that people can say "okay, let's do this" and actually sit down and do "this" and not have to beat their brain into submission first.

(this is not a flex AT ALL) I am selfless to a fault. I care so little about my needs in comparison to others' and I hate it

Sometimes I picture my prefrontal cortex as a well meaning bureaucrat who's just like "oh, trust me, I know the rules are terrible and there's an active problem. Nothing I can do about it though, I just work here. Second that order comes in though, I'm on it boss, you better believe. You're gonna want to talk to my manager. Yeah, he doesn't take calls. It sucks, could maybe get something fixed around here. "

Don't self diagnose based on a single internet discussion but self diagnosis is crucial to getting yourself some relief. I didn't get a diagnosis until I was about 40, and even at this point the change was dramatic. I don't take stimulants but I take a few medications and it made life so much easier, I doubled my salary in 3 years, bought a house, just had a fantastic few years. But I also have a ton of trauma, I hurt a lot of people and myself from being so chaotic and depressed and incapable of processing thoughts or feelings, or being able to handle basic finances. I also lost like 15 years of good life where I could have been successful and happy instead of depressed and stuck in a shitty job with no clear way out.

If you're reading these discussions and realizing that it seems a little too familiar, take this seriously. If you decide you have it, don't take anyone's word that you don't. Its hard to get treated IMO, so if you see a therapist and they don't want to treat you for ADHD, then bye bye, find another one who will take it seriously. I went to therapists on and off for years trying to figure out why I was depressed, and they basically told me I was okay, the normal amount of unhappy with regular life stuff. I finally got on a mild antidepressant and it helped immensely. I fought and found out the antidepressant had an off label use for treating mild ADHD, and when my daughter got diagnosed I looked more into it. When I went to therapists to get treated for ADHD, they told me I was just depressed. so you gotta fight for yourself, but this world is a fuck, and it can be extremely worth while once you get what you might need.

Yeah, a lot of brain things are like that. The way I look at it is, everyone sees a little of it, but some people see a lot of it. If you see a lot, it's not self diagnosis to say "I have a lot of symptoms in common with people who have this, so I asked a professional".

You also don't need a diagnosis to practice some of the coping strategies that people have that are non-medication. If they turn out to be helpful, that's maybe a another reason to ask a professional.

Self diagnosis is a bad idea, but it's also a bad idea to ignore marked similarities you see between yourself and others. And stuff like "always put your keys and wallet in a specific basket" is only the cost of the basket.

I think the reaction depends on how aware one is of how one's flow state works. Neurotypical people seem to be able to get back into it much easier than us ADHD types, but I think that's often because our flow states tend to be deeper, so it's much more annoying to be knocked out of it for seemingly trivial reasons by people who don't know how hard it is to get back into that state after an interruption.

In my opinion, this is (mostly) a "training issue". If I know this is how my brain works, it's my job to train those around me on how to help me be as efficient as possible, even if it's something as simple as "if my headphones are on, do not interrupt me unless something is ON FIRE, OR if I have been working for more than 3 hours without a break."

If either of those things are true, it's also my job to not be annoyed by the interruption, which is of course often harder than the interruption itself.