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I used to not really like JKR for reasons like these: https://stallman.org/harry-potter.html
I am not completely sure where I stand on her substantive opinions in relation to trans issues. I think it's a debate where both sides make some good points.
But she is definitely right about the decline of free speech.
In the nicest possible way, what do you mean by "both sides" in this context? One side says that trans people either don't or shouldn't exist and the other side says they should exist. I know that may sound extreme or combative but that's fundamentally "the debate" so I genuinely want to understand how you reached this "both sides have merit" stance that some people close to me also take but I've never understood.
I don't think this is an accurate description of the debate.
My understanding of the "TERF" position is that they say that if it is excessively easy to declare oneself as trans, this can be misused by men wanting to get access to spaces reserved for women. Whether one agrees with that point or not, I do not think it is completely illegitimate.
I usually don't say anything about this topic at all on the Internet and I am right now reminded of why. I am already starting to regret stating even my relative neutrality on it.
Without the context of your understanding of the debate as you've outlined here we can only guess what you meant by "the debate" in your previous comment so thanks for taking the time to describe it. I absolutely agree that there needs be great care around the legitimacy of when someone declaring their gender should be taken seriously or not in some limited and extreme circumstances (prisons spring to mind). I think your characterisation of the terf argument if you speak to normal people is about accurate from my limited experience. The media and some outspoken terfs like JK are on the more extreme side of that where they say that it is already "too easy" to legitimately change their gender. Which is where I fundamentally disagree with them since I know the hoops some of my friends have had to jump through to even get the smallest amount of help from health providers.
(I'm using "legitimate" above as a sort of catch all for legal or what the person genuinely feels. I don't think legal and legitimate are the same thing in this context, hence the distinction.)