this post was submitted on 20 Jun 2023
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Sounds to me like you have learned some things. You're just looking for encouragement, now, which is totally understandable and very very commendable.
Don't ever let yourself question your progress as a static benchmark. You question your habits and wish to return to a more productive/happier state.. do you see something wrong with that? It's very human, and we all fall off the horse and have to recover, sometimes
Dust yourself off - take a breathe - keep going, when you can.
Follow your own drum beat and keep focus on those things you wrote about - improving yourself seemed to make you happy. Good luck - You don't need it. ✌️
I know it's been 5 days but I just want to thank you for believing in me, a random person on the internet. I have been stuck in another spiral of wallowing in self-hatred and overall negative things. Typing down this reply is making me anxious already but I know that I have to power through it and just start doing things. I'm preparing for a reset come July 1. Since 3rd party reddit apps will die that day, I can finally get rid of the main stress bringer in my life. I'm also going to set better achievable goals this time around. I will make it work.
Good - one final word of advice, it's really easy to trap yourself by setting too big of goals, which you seem to be aware of..
The advice has more to do with you saying you're preparing for a reset - I admire and appreciate your effort, but please, just remember: If the reset doesn't happen as you expect/imagine (or gets interrupted or something), that does not mean you have failed. You may need to realign how you do things multiple times before finding success.
Focus on the effort, not the outcome. It'll come before you know it, but the whole watched pot never boils thing ... You know.
Much love - and if ya can, one day, when you're stronger than you are now, help someone who needs it. I'm only here because others lent me strength when I didn't have it. Take care, fellow human