First it starts with a comedy video which turns into this weird creepy thing about kids running through the Paris sewers, encountering an alligator, then getting rowed out and into the Seine by a ghost and it cuts to reality and all the nations are going down the river on boats past a bunch of water jets because they're not doing this in a stadium.
This looks awful and ridiculous. Compare this to the spectacle of London 2012.
Now they're doing some weird old Hollywood movie musical style musical number with Lady Gaga and she's on a staircase, which is... somewhere in Paris?
I am so fucking confused.
Edit: They just cut to Macron and he looks as confused as I am.
Minions. MINIONS. Like from Despicable Me. I’m not really here, I took some sort of massive dose of shrooms accidentally, right?
They finally had attention there. I thought they were going to do a Costeau reference there haha. Now Macron is doing his proud poker face during the Marseillaise (thinking revolution and anarchism is nice, but don't bring down the state while I'm president, please)
I think the Minions were onboard Captain Nemo’s Nautilus