[Outdated, please look at pinned post] Casual Conversation

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I've noticed that my brain's default friends activity is "go hang at a bar". (lemm.ee)

submitted 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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99% of my ideas for what to do with friends have to do with "we hang, but at a bar".

I've started to consider suggesting aquarium trips, outdoor movie nights, etc, but then I decided it might be nice to chit chat about it with y'all because I wanna hear what y'all like. Especially things you didn't expect to be as pleasant as they were but became a regular thing.

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[–] [email protected] 8 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

Most of the bars I've been to are really loud and it's almost impossible to hear anyone talking to me, so I just invite my friends to my apartment. I spend less on alcohol that way too...

If I want to hang out while doing something, I suggest going to a restaurant because that's an experience I can't replicate at home. (I don't cook very well.)

[–] [email protected] 5 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (2 children)

One problem that I forgot to mention is that I am a male who works with and meets a lot of women. I also tend to mesh better with women than men. However, even though I'm non-binary, if I meet a new person who is a woman, it feels a little too something-or-other to invite them into my home when we still don't know each other that well. Bars are a neutral, public, casual space.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago

That's a very good point. When I was younger, I was naive and thought I could invite women over the same way as I could invite men. I must have made most of them uncomfortable (and probably disappointed the ones who did come over).

[–] [email protected] 1 points 10 months ago

It's less weird if you have a group of people over, as long as everyone knows it's a group thing. That's my default (I find bars too loud for conversation)--board/party games and drinks are a great combo.