this post was submitted on 26 Jan 2024
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“Kenny just began to gasp for air repeatedly and the execution took about 25 minutes total.”

Pretty compassionate way to kill a person.

Once again, the Law in the south is brutal.

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[–] [email protected] 29 points 10 months ago (33 children)

personally i think we should start doing a slightly modified version of the traditional british canon execution.

For those who aren't familar, you strap a dude to the front of a canon, with a dud charge (i don't believe there is a projectile) and then set it off and run. Apparently it's pretty "spectacular" I say we do the same thing but delete the head in the process. Or perhaps add a canon ball because why not.

If we're executing people theres no need to pretend what we're doing is "good"

[–] [email protected] 16 points 10 months ago (30 children)

Too expensive and dangerous. A 2-ton tungsten cube dropped on the head is quick, painless, cheap, and puts on a show that can be cleaned up with a power washer.

[–] spikespaz 6 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

Tungsten is not cheap, also it might fracture

[–] [email protected] 20 points 10 months ago (2 children)

It costs about $1.25m to execute one person currently. 2 tons of tungsten costs $60k spot, $240k with government contract as a one-time purchase. If it were to become damaged, it can be recycled into a new state sanctioned penal murder cube. Given the price of tungsten will increase in value approximately 100% per decade, it is a viable government investment.

Elect me to be king of America. I will balance the budget and establish a stranger economy with a dollar backed by state sanctioned penal murder cubes and other innovative and cost-effective measures. We will all be equal in death and that is a promise you can count your votes on.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 10 months ago (1 children)

If it were to become damaged, it can be recycled into a new state sanctioned penal murder cube.

Lmao

[–] [email protected] 4 points 10 months ago

I can't agree with this, everyone knows you're supposed to reuse before recycle. The murder cube will look way more badass with some chips and cracks in it

[–] [email protected] 4 points 10 months ago (2 children)

You act like running a country is hard. The only hard part of running America is hiding all your bribes.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

Under my administration I will have a website that will clearly show contributions to my throne with one of those donations thermometers that will be updated live and never surpass 7/8th full because the goal is always just a bit more money. Under it you will find about 10 clickbait user-targeted ads, a leaderboard, loser board, and the last 10 donations. There will also be links to my Patreon, Venmo, CashApp, Fansly, and Onlyfans. I am all about transparency and honesty in my rule.

I will use those mandatory contributions to pay for universal healthcare and cutting edge wars of aggression against states with viable economic exploitation possibilities or usable land for battery factories to supply a green infinite rail system that services all major cities without using fossil-fuels to move people and goods.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 10 months ago
[–] [email protected] 6 points 10 months ago

Hello? It's called "lobbying" and you don't have to hide anything.

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