this post was submitted on 12 Nov 2023
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Showerthoughts

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A "Showerthought" is a simple term used to describe the thoughts that pop into your head while you're doing everyday things like taking a shower, driving, or just daydreaming. The best ones are thoughts that many people can relate to and they find something funny or interesting in regular stuff.

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A lot of societies problems would be solved if they taught about forming healthy relationships in school. (lemmy.world)
submitted 1 year ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
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Right now there is a loneliness epidemic throughout the world. More and more people aren't entering relationships. Gen Z men are having significant trouble dating while there are some economic factors in the mix. From my own view and experiences combined with what I've read most Gen Z men are lack the social and communication skills to even enter a relationship. This has and in the future will lead to extreme issues. There's already been a marked rise in hostility towards women by young men (think Andrew Tate and his ilk) that's likely born out of this frustration. I would definitely say there's been a rise in gender hostility ever since the pandemic.

Back in the 50s there was arranged marriages. All a person had to do was just show but now that's gone because it was an unequal system and I think society missed its chance to establish something much healthier and better in its wake. Now we have people that are unable to connect with each other. We just toss people blindly into the mess that is human interaction and relationships and no one knows what to do anymore. We could be have the most fulfilling relationships humans have ever had. Think of the amount of people who would of never have entered abusive relationships had there been someone around them that showed them what love exactly is.

The way we teach is so heavily focused on teaching people how to be worker drones that we forget the human part of the person. This is why a lot of people who do extreme well in school and college fare so poorly in relationships and have higher rates of depression. We are the most educated and advanced in human history, we know psychology, we can teach this shit rather than tossing people blindly into the meat grinder.

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[–] [email protected] 38 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

This isn't just an issue in terms of romantic relationships, or gender-specific.

We used to all be exposed to the same media and had common points of reference and interest. It was called water cooler discussion. Unless you're into sports, this doesn't really exist any more.

We used to share a more common set of customs. Schools used to have etiquette/finishing classes. Was a lot of it ultimately arbitrary and made up? Of course, but we were all taught the same things, and they became a common language. You knew to take off your hat/glasses when talking to me to show a level of courtesy and respect, and I knew you were showing respect when you did that. This also worked in terms of things like knowing when to adopt a formal tone with others... many people don't have a formal tone any more, let alone know how to use it.

Everyday life thrust us into more social interaction, too. You used to have to go to stores, talk to people. Even public transport and public spaces used to be a social experience before everyone buried themselves in their mobile phones and headphones. Now the majority of people left trying to interact with you in public are weirdos or trying to sell you something, so people assume anyone approaching you in public is a weirdo or trying to sell you something, suddenly it is taboo to even try to strike up a conversation with a stranger.

And modern outlets like social media encourage some of our worst tendencies. Everything escalates into outrage, tribal warfare, makes us really bad at self-moderation and letting things go.

The-way-things-were was never ideal for a minority of people, but the way things are is ideal for no one. I strongly believe even the innovations that are supposed to help a lot of minorities are hurting them to a degree, too. I fit into a couple of those minority categories myself, and have to force myself to go outside, to use manned checkouts, to put away my phone when outside, as while the alternatives may be easier in the short-term, in the long-term they are making me both physically and mentally less-resiliant.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Yeah, go out and meet random people. Trains are great, as everyone it out of their comfort zone and bored.

Apart from that its pretty hard, because literally staying at home on a single spot, looking in a single direction, seems so fulfilling. Its pretty crazy actually, in the 70s or so nobody would have just sat there and done nothing, even with TVs that was harder and more social.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

I think these comments do make good points, but I think you're romanticizing the past a bit. Just because people didn't have computers/cell phones I can assure you plenty of people in the 70s were "doing nothing" in similar ways.